Allll the work

So much and so little going on.  Working on self and weight.  Meds are on an even keel. Side effects from lowering dose much better and anxiety stabilized. I have been doing EMDR for all the big issues as well as for food addiction, spending horrors, booze avoidance. Cutting back on sleeping pills, avoiding anti…

Weird 

So, I have been eating fairly healthy and getting exercise by getting in my goal steps and swimming. It’s weird to feel good/moderately energetic.  Working on my brain and my relationship with food. Trying to figure out when I am physically hungry, mouth hungry (mmm. More!), or brain hungry (cravings). For the most part I…

Ass movement

Yeah.. so…  looking into bariatric surgery. Been overweight most of my life. All the diets and many of the gimmicks. Finally got the call for orientation; many of the testing bits have been done. Blood work and bone density looks great. Every time I start to wonder about it, I think of hubby’s quote “better…

Whoops!

Ooooh. I suppose I should mention that I am currently lowering my antidepressant dose. Started at 40 and cheerfully tapered to 20 mg… then… THE WALL!!!!  Hit it like I was doing 100 miles an hour straight into the bricks. The side effects made themselves known. Electric shocks. Moderate to high anxiety.   It’s been…

Huh.

Well it sucks that my last post didn’t post. Ok. Things have weirdly been working in the universe as I have been doing other things.  Earlier this year, I started meditation and mindfulness. I find it helps me step back from my emotions and hopefully view things more dispassionately and not react to ALL THE…

Yippee!!

Small bites… Small bites… Hubby getting some things done, me continuing to clean and organize the bedroom (a start)/the laundry room/room closets. Purging his old, unused, or garbage clothes.  1/2 a bedroom, 1/2 a spare room, and the bathroom to go. All hotel bottles of amenities in a bag, ready to take to work for…

cause why?

So, I have been somewhat introspective of late. I am thinking of negativity… how the little things we say or tell ourselves are often negative and that energy is what is sent out to the universe. Changing those thoughts is not easy. Recognizing those thoughts are not easy! I am hoping I can start to…

Geh

A whole week of migraine. It’s fantastic timing since this was my first week back to work and I called in sick.  I am fairly sure my boss is incredibly impressed. 😦 I have resumed posting my gratitudes on fb. My entire last 5 weeks have been gratitude and I posted about all the cool…

Fuck

Ok. things are a bit much today Friend sick with untreatable cancer. Neck sore and eye twitching and won’t stop. Dog barking so much i want to smack her. Having to work extra because I couldn’t finish or start my work day. Started tracking food again… we’ll see how that goes. Trip coming and I…

:/

Ok. Things are becoming real.  Trip starts in 12 days. I have had a hundred panic attacks, 3 online shopping trips, a huge shopping trip for hubby, laundry is being done, clothes are being cleaned up/hung up, areas are being tidied.  I am not coming home to a dirty house! Runners to be bought, packing…

Blark 

Things haven’t been bad. Sunshine. Hot tubs. Champagne. Trip planning. Motorcycle riding. Purple lipstick.  Occasional panic attacks. Occasional headaches. Fell over on my bike.  Can’t make up my mind about what I am doing this w/e. Home or travel? Can I afford trip with big trip coming up in a few weeks? I really would…